I Love My Life!: August 2008

Sunday, August 31, 2008

Life reflecting on a story..

lol.. though i'm not madly in love with a vampire and always get protection from Edward Cullen(the vampire), yet i just feel like i'm living her life.. XP okay, forget about the vampire part.. hahahaha...

there's always this feeling haunting me ever since i know how nice it feels like to be loved and to love someone.. okay, i got all that from movies and shows.. hehe.. and they kinda like taught me lotsa stuffs about life.. seen bitchy, mean, nice, friendly and fun people for more than a decade now..

and yep, used to be talkative, nosy and clumsy fellow whom people consider annoying.. and i've forgotten when i stopped being such a stupid brat.. so yea, i started being quiet all the time as in antisocial they call it.. and always a loner.. hahaha.. low self-esteem because i'm a nobody.. not smart, nerdy(ugly) and blur.. so yea, that was me..

i always isolate myself from people because i seem ta be an outcast after all.. since i'm so lonely, i read books to keep me accompanied with stories which i dreamed of living the lives of the characters inside.. hahaha.. as i read along, i was like why can't i be like them? why why why why why??!! isn't there someone out there waiting.. i mean.. you know.. =.=

so i've been like i'll stay single then.. forever.. sob sob.. the loneliness was killing me.. helloooo.. anybody there? echoo.... fine, nobody there..

do i sound like i'm eager to have my own that kinda life? i'm not sure though.. just felt lonely.. >.<>

i read twilight last year(2007).. lol.. was still single.. at first, i thought that book was nothing special but as i went through the pages.. i was like not bad!! i mean, this book is like the coolest book ever.. >.<

so this so-called sweet 16 year, was something more than just sweet.. hahaha.. after receiving my PMR results and knowing that hey, i'm actually a somebody.. lol.. i attended guides camp and it was rather fun? hahaha.. quite torturing but then it went well i guess..

so this year, i wanted to improve myself really badly.. i trained every weekend running 10 rounds of a field near my house? lol.. and on that very day of cross country(1st of Feb.. still remembered.. haha), i ran and ran.. finally, i was about to finish.. but i'm not a sprinter.. never will be.. at least i got 10th placing in the senior category.. lol.. i mean this is like really something for mua in my whole secondary life.. i've never tried this hard running before..

okay, out of the subject.. hmm.. where was i?

right, so on that very day i came back from school, i found my long lost friend? lol.. and i replied a day later.. XP and it was quite late so we gotta sleep already.. hahaha.. surprisingly, he said yes that we continue tomorrow? so good ar? i thought.. lol.. i thought people would actually ask me to forget about the whole thing and buh-bye.. ??

so we did continue the next day.. oops.. i'm not gonna go into detail.. so yea.. thats how it started?

and now, i'm truly, awfully, sincerely, superbly grateful to finally have the life i wished of having and thank god for making all these come true! hahahahaha... i couldn't be any happier in my entire life..

so i read eclipse this year.. and i felt like my life now is like reflecting on that story.. lol? anyway, thanks for stepping in to my life.. i just couldn't live without you.. >.<

every second every minute every hour every day being without you just feels like i'm all alone in this complicated world.. lost in the middle of nowhere.. how horrifying that could be..

and when i was down, who pulled me up and gave me hope again?

who made me feel its good to be me and not to pretend to be what you're not?

who thinks i'm actually a somebody in this world?

who makes me happy everytime?

who cares the most?

theres only ONE person in this whole wide world does all the above..

and now, there's something in life i wanna treasure and cherish until the last beat of my heart.. Y-O-U..

Saturday, August 30, 2008

Living wih rules that would kill...

okay, ever since i owned my own cellphone, my mom was like keeping an eye on me.. and i remembered i used prepaid number and there's 50 bucks in it.. i dunno whats prepaid so i used it to call my friends for a few days until i can't make any calls at all.. so i was panicking and i told my dad about it.. he was like so cool and said i finished my 50 bucks.. err?? okay.. and i demanded i want a postpaid number!
so on the first day of school of standard 5, my parents went to get one for me which i'm still using it until this very day.. lol.. i gave a lame excuse for owning a cellphone which for emergency uses in school? hahaha.. so i brought my phone to school everyday without anyone knowing it except for my friends.. those trustworthy ones of course.. so until standard 6, i didn't use much of my phone so i kinda asked my mom to cut the line.. and it was restored in form 1?
so now, i've been strictly inflicted by these stupid rules.. how am i gonna live like that?!! lol.. not only phone probs..
like i said, always overdo stuffs.. used to watch lotsa shows until i purposely got up to watch and i've been caught red handed by my mom.. =.= she was angry of course.. i smiled and quickly get the hell up to my room and went to bed.. XP
yea, not only this.. i love to read.. haha.. and books these days ain't cheap.. 2 books 100 over bucks... furthermore, i'll read until i can't control myself.. and finished everything in one whole shot if i'm fully addicted to them.. so my mom was like can you read slower? err... sorry? >.<>.<
no matter how tough it may be, i'll live with it..

Friday, August 29, 2008

I'm someone who always get attached to juniors?

LOL.. izzit me or izzit juniors kept clinging on to me whenever i go? i mean its not like i wanna brag about this? but its like the people i talk to the most are juniors and they seemed happy talking to me.. hmm.. i knew some form 1 girls when we were having our marching practice on tuesday and thursday this week.. and we got closer day by day.. and lol.. yesterday, there's this girl name thong wei kei.. we were like waiting for our turn to march and our crew was like all scattered around because we were finding our friends to talk to.. so i didn't move and i was still standing at the same spot.. whereas the form 1s came surrounding me and started talking to me because i talked to them too.. for once or twice.. hehe.. and we were like sharing jokes.. those cold ones that would make you freeze to death.. lol..
we kinda enjoyed that and they were so like err.. naive when they talk?
wei kei just asked me a question.. "why you don't find your form 4 friends to talk to huh?" and i was like "because they didn't come to find me".. so she joked and said "ouh, then we all form 1 go lor.." "ahh.. no no.. i don't want you to leave.. stay where you are!" i mean, what should i do? get lonelier? nah! so they laughed and we talked more and more..
see.. form 1s are really really friendly kids and they are so nice to talk to when you are bored... its like living in a stress-free world with them.. lol.. really..
they talk about cute stuffs that would make you laugh like hell..
and today, we have our girl guides farewell for the formers so they were wanting to take a whole group picture.. so this lil junior over here.. like to mix around with me ever since she got to know me.. and when i was like standing in a corner.. she asked me to stand beside her.. lol.. thats really nice of her to do so.. i mean nobody there even thought of doing so.. i'm touched.. i mean really.. XP
all in all.. i don't really mix with friends my age but juniors.. except for close friends.. hehehe.. prefects nor students.. you can see me wtih juniors more often.. hahahahaha... i guess thats it for now.. juniors make me laugh though they don't talk about those stuffs like me and my friends do but i'm cool with them.. hee

Marching nightmare

though it ain't that obvious but its a blue-black which i got from banging on to one of my junior's hand while marching.. so painful!! ahhhhh...

Thursday, August 28, 2008

About one's self

well, i'm kinda like a super ordinary person who don't really understand myself well nor others.. and i'm just only interested in knowing more about somebody.. the only one in this world.. so yea.. haha
i'm always so blur with stuffs and i tend to do things half-heartedly.. lol.. like writing a story last year.. or maybe i should continue with it someday? haha.. anyway, i'm an antisocial type.. bad in socializing with others and my parents think i should try to be like my cousins.. =.= yea, i'm trying real hard to do so and still working on it?
used to be super clumsy when i was little and people used to hate me for that.. XP
seems like i've improved now? lol.. and i'm happy with my life ever since that day.. hahaha.. yea, and thats the main reason why i'm still living happily right now.. thank god so much for my dreams and all to come true! lol..
i don't go out much.. haha.. i'll do anything for a friend in need no matter what.. i mean if they really are my true friends.. XP
i'm that kinda person who don't smile much.. lol.. except for photo shots, friends and families.. hehe.. and most of all that someone.. lol..
i love music and art.. animes.. and other stuffs.. not sure though.. haha..
wanting to prove that i'm a somebody and not a nobody in this world.. ever wonder why smart people always get the credit and normal people won't be appreciated? thats so unfair though!
i'll do anything to be a better person in life.. i wanna guide people to find their way back or maybe to a new future.. lol! stuffs like that.. >.<
i'll always overdo stuffs like read too much.. talk too much on the phone.. sms too much.. online until very late at night and others.. hahahaha.. yep, thats me.. XP
i'm a super fan of Hayao Miyazaki.. since standard 4.. lol.. his films are so totally awesome and inspiring.. thats the best part about japanese! lol.. thats my point of view.. hehe
hmm.. take things for granted.. and i usually get lectured from that.. sob sob...
lazy at times but well disciplined when i'm determined to do something..
don't ever think of challenging me when i have everything in my hands.. you'll lose.. lol..
hot headed and i'll show you who's boss when i get mad..
love philosophical stuffs a lot because they bring meaning to life and not crappy stuffs..
hate people who are being lebih because they're loud and they are self-centred.. they think they're the only ones in this whole planet and we should listen to their stupid speech.. get a grip..
i love my life now because lotsa stuffs have changed ever since THAT DAY(again)---thats when i started to discover more happenings in life.. hahaha..
i love ta make people laugh.. its like my fav past time.. hehe.. they make me happy when they do that.. so yea..
i don't get people who are so perasan and can't keep their cool.. thats so lame of them.. =.=
showing off is never a good thing to do.. but sometimes you have to fight back by doing this to make people realise stuffs.. yea, SOMETIMES..
i guess thats all for the time being.. haha

Never let certs and marks deceive you in doing things you don't even like

even though i am not fond of certs nor marks given in my ko-ku record yet i was still chosen for the 31st of August march out.. UGH!! ya know what i think? THEY shouldn't be inflicting this collecting-certs-mission norm showing that you're active and all in innocent people's life! how despicable can they be to do so.. i was not happy at all when i knew i was chosen and my friend asked me to chill because they're giving out certs.. spst! so what?!
LOL.. at first i thought certs are important to kinda like apply for stuffs but then on second thought, they worth nothing at all.. sigh..
and now, i'm totally not getting myself involved in this kinda situation again unless i'm forced to do so.. yea, unlucky me.. gonna get darker and soon.. i'll be an african girl.. XP

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Never to sit with a brainiac unless you are ready to do so

okay, here's the thing.. i sat beside a master mind last year by mistake.. it wasn't my idea.. at all.. it was someone who was so eager to sit with smart people until she dragged me along and said " hey, why not sit with her?" i was like.. =.= you serious? lol.. i was reluctant to but then i just followed what she said.. eventually, i got stuck with that brainiac for a whole year and i suffered a lot!!!! she elbows me whenever she wants me to listen to her or something.. ugh! thinks she's so great ei? think again! i've been not-liking or maybe hating her ever since i sat with her last year.. all in all, i did learn something from her.. that is to be disciplined when you're studying? i got up at 3 in the morning to study last year.. but for this year.. i got lazier and stupid-er.. because maybe form 4 life is too relaxing? lol.. i dunno.. maybe my determination haven't get arrive yet.. hahahaha.. oops.. terpesong cerita.. okay, lets get back to the topic.. hmm.. so yea, i noticed that she's been trying to be everything though she already knew that its impossible to do so because people aren't perfect afterall.. so PLS get the picture dude!! anyway.. don't feel like talking about her anymore.. its really frustrating.. conclusion, you'll suffer with these kinda people.. one thing is for sure is that they aint good in art!!! wakakakaka...